During a rather difficult experience recently, I began to journal using my Brain Dump method (to be covered in a future article) until I could understand a reason for that experience.
In a state of gloom, I picked up a book I had put aside a while back and began to read. And I couldn’t put it down.
The answers I was seeking as to the meaning of my own life and its purpose began to shine through the words.
The meaning of life…
Life is suffering. But it suffering with a purpose. It is to teach you to be strong, like a tree that must be untethered when planted lest it’s trunk never achieves strength to endure the harsh environment it lives in.
But the suffering is even more that this. It is choosing to do the opposite of the evil perpetrated on you, and exchange that evil for Good. In that sacrifice of self for the greater good, you become stronger. And you overcome evil just by the sheer victory of not taking on the evil that has been put upon you.
As Carl Jung said, “No tree can grow to Heaven unless its roots reach down to Hell.”
The opposite response, being vengeful, only takes on the intrinsic evil that befell you. And you become one step closer to Hell. In taking on the evil, the tree withers and dies, for it strives to grow down into the flames instead of up into the fresh air above.
The evil that befell me, the inexplicable and repeated attacks and rejection by one closest to me for reasons unknown even to themselves, was the roots of my essence reaching into Hell. But to ask the reason for these events, the ability to journal out my puzzlement led me to pick up the book in the first place. And that led me to growth.
By the evening, the answer was there…
The encounter of pure evil through a loved one came from the depths of pain they were experiencing. But not yet being aware of their own triggers, they took their anger and vengeance out on someone they felt they could subdue by force. Since I am not the parent, I was the target of that hatred.
Life is suffering. But it suffering with a purpose.
When the smoke had cleared and the environment had calmed down, it became clear to the perpetrator that their actions had no reason. Lacking maturity, they devolved into a meltdown attacking the person with whom they perceived as a weak link. Me.
And they apologized.
That event also opened up an opportunity of discovery for me…
I could not take revenge upon the innocent. Nor could I oppress the oppressor. That choice was to curse my position and fate, or change my own perception about Life in general – to accept the suffering, and exchange my hurt and confusion into something greater.
…I could take another path – one that grasped something higher, even if there was no apparent reason for the attack.
If I took on the wrong from someone I loved and became embittered by it, I would become less than they were. I would not only lower myself to their depths of despair, but I would find a way to seek vengeance. That is the evil that confronts each one of us when our ego is wounded.
Or I could take another path – one that grasped something higher, even if there was no apparent reason for the attack. Instead of vengeance, I could embrace the pain, willingly taking it on, absorbing the wickedness, as it were, and recreating into a greater Good. It was the exchange of the Evil for a Good, sacrificing the self for the sake of the other.
And it was that path I was able to choose.
But I could not have done it without this deep, very provocative writing.
What was the writing?
It is a book entitled, “”The 12 Rules For Life” by Jordan Peterson.
Some consider him controversial, but to those whose lives he’s touched over the decades, he is a brilliant philosopher and scholar. His insight into the human psyche is profound. And his acquired experiential and observational wisdom has given him the ability to reach the masses with genuine compassion for the human plight.
Some consider him controversial, but to those whose lives he’s touched over the decades, he is a brilliant philosopher and scholar. His insight into the human psyche is profound.
I first encountered this man when I heard him speaking on a few motivational videos. But I picked up the book when I listened to him go over his 12 Rules in a speech he gave a few years ago. While he covered all the bases, nothing compared to the details and examples he gives in his writing.
The book has been summarized well by AI (with my corrections or further explanations in italicized words.):
- Stand up straight with your shoulders back: This rule emphasizes the importance of physical posture and its impact on one’s mental attitude and confidence. (And you’ll learn all about lobsters!)
- Treat yourself like someone you are responsible for helping: This rule encourages self-care and self-discipline, and the importance of taking responsibility for one’s own life.
- Make at least one thing better or more beautiful: This rule shows the necessity of making good choices that have a positive impact on yourself as well as those around you.
- Compare yourself with who you were yesterday, not with who someone else is today: This rule reveals the importance of comparing yourself to who you were, rather than comparing oneself to others.
- Do not let your children do anything that makes you dislike them: This rule emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries and discipline for children. (The chapter explains what those boundaries look like, and the impact the lack of discipline has on the child’s future and their immediate encounter with those outside the family today.)
- Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world: This rule encourages personal responsibility and self-reflection before criticizing others.
- Pursue what is meaningful (not what is expedient): This rule emphasizes the importance of pursuing one’s passions and values, rather than pursuing immediate gratification for the short term.
- Tell the truth—or, at least, don’t lie: This rule emphasizes the importance of honesty and integrity. (It also goes into great personal and historical depth on choosing to live by lying, or not. The results of living using lies and deceit has resulted in very real, frightening, and tyrannical ways globally.)
- Assume that the person you are listening to might know something you don’t: This rule encourages humility and open-mindedness. (Don’t let yourself think you have all the answers. You probably don’t.)
- Be Precise in your speech: This rule emphasizes the importance of clear and accurate communication.
- Do not bother children when they are skateboarding: This rule is often interpreted as a reminder to let children take risks and learn from their mistakes. (It also pertains to adults as well. Taking risks is necessary in life. This shows what happens when you make the choice to take the risk or not.)
- Pet a cat when you encounter one on the street: This rule is often seen as a reminder to appreciate the beauty and wonder of the world around us. (Live in simplicity. Take the time to live in simplicity and acceptance of the world around you.)
Where did he first make all this public?
He first introduced the concept on Quora when answering this question, “What makes life more meaningful?” His response struck a chord with the readers, and his answer cracked the 2,000 up-vote barrier on the site.
He is a strong critic of the idea that Happiness is the goal to which every human should attain. The entire core of that concept erodes when faced with the harsh reality of existence. As in my recent experience. One can only master so much in one’s personal life before things inevitably go sideways.
Even that idea comes from his 12 Rules.
Why should anyone read this book?
The entire book is deep and profound. Many readers have said that this book saved their lives from the prospect of suicide. Others were given a second chance to change their direction from ill-chosen paths. Still more have been able to understand the real meaning and purpose of Life – and specifically how it all applies to their own.
If you are seeking an explanation to “What is the Meaning of Life”, this is the key to unlock that answer.
I cannot recommend this writing strongly enough. Especially for those who are struggling with the deeper meaning and purpose of their own existence. If you are seeking an explanation to “What is the Meaning of Life”, this is the key to unlock that answer.
It has helped me change my own perspective. And it one of the few books I will read over and over again. It is impossible to read it only once and grasp all the concepts it contains. Each time brings new insight.
But as a sample of its content for those who prefer a video first, you can listen to Jordan talk about his 12 Rules for life in the talk below. This is the one that peeked my curiosity:
Share your thoughts…
Have you read the book? What impact has it had on your own life? Do you have another one that has helped give you insight into your own life?
Feel free to share your comments with us. We’d love to hear your feedback!