Labels. We all use them. Children call each other names. Parents call their children by names of endearment. Teachers categorize students based on their abilities or skillsets. Companies label employees by the positions they hold.
What are labels?
Labels are defined as “a descriptive word or phrase applied to a person, group, theory, etc. as a convenient generalized classification”. (Collins Dictionary online, March 30, 2024)
Humans have used labels for as long as forms of communication have existed. They help to deliver a complex definition or explanation of something that is commonly understood between groups of individuals. In this simple way, they help to simplify and create understanding of familiar characterizations or ideas between individuals regarding the object of their conversation.
Labels also make complicated ideas more consumable by the use of this simple shortcut tool.
What are some labels we commonly use today?
Labels cover a wide gamut of objects. From packages and the use of product and bar codes, to people by use of words and phrases to describe a particular characteristic.
Children use labels in the form of epithets, or descriptions, by the use of name-calling. They are able to convey an idea about other children to their peers. and in some cases it will be easier to help identify a new child to the group with long-winded explanations.
Instead of identifying an individual by an obvious characteristic (such as “the girl with blond hair”), it defines the person by an attribute that associates with their self-respect.
But the use of belittling terms, such as “runts”, “foot stools”, “weird”, “lazy”, or even something that points out a bodily anomaly (such as short legs, a limp, or a cyst on the face) to disrepute the child in question, only serves to demean another with harmful intent. Instead of identifying an individual by an obvious characteristic (such as “the girl with blond hair”), it defines the person by an attribute that associates with their self-respect. And it typically done by one or more children to “fit in” with the rest of the group.
Adults are not immune to this calumny, either. I cannot count the number of times I had coworkers label me as a “debby downer”, “quality control police”, “not a team player”, “anti-social”. Especially in employment settings, and by peers such labels are not only hurtful, it displays a form of ignorance about the person targeted.
Slander is readily used in the political realm against opponents. And people who do not agree with narratives propagated by the media circles are often shamed in the resulting public discourse.
Name calling is universal. No one is immune to its use.
Results of calumniation…
What most people do not understand is that once these labels are spread among the populace, the damage done to a person’s reputation and character is difficult to undo. Even when the slander is proved to be incorrect.
What most people do not understand is that once these labels are spread among the populace, the damage done to a person’s reputation and character is difficult to undo.
The contributor of such calumny remains in a shroud of ignorance. Continuing to label someone else without understanding does so not only incorrectly, but sees no reason to stop doing so. Especially if their peers are in agreement with them.
The recipient, on the other hand, is often hurt. Their reputation is shredded in the public eye with little hope of recovery. And in hearing the label often enough, can begin to believe that the characterization is true. Especially if it comes from multiple sources they once believed reliable.
So are all labels bad?
If an error-free label is used, it can help to convey a particular aspect of someone that would otherwise not be understood, or would take a long time to define what is meant. It can definitely be helpful in the course of some conversations, as long as the label is understood in the same way between the individuals.
The reputation of someone is crucial to the dignity of every human being. So using labels must be done judiciously.
The reputation of someone is crucial to the dignity of every human being. So using labels must be done judiciously.
But purposefully calumniating an individual for the purpose of destroying their reputation especially to strangers only serves to harm relationships – yours as well as theirs. It is best to find out if the label is justified and true before passing it along to others.
What if you are the recipient of false labels?
Remember that the person who is using the label incorrectly may not be aware of their error. If you are able to do so, gently approach the person and find out what their understanding of that characterization means. If they have a false understanding of the meaning, show them what the real definition is. Then help them to understand that the label doesn’t define who you know you are.
Remember that the person who is using the label incorrectly may not be aware of their error.
If they are determined to remain in their ignorance, you must just walk away. You cannot change the minds of those who are stubborn in their falsehoods, and arguments will serve no purpose to either one of you.
But if the label is true, understand that it only identifies a trait about yourself. It doesn’t define who you are, and certainly doesn’t represent who you are as a whole person.
Before you use labels…
Be aware of the meaning of the label. Understand the totality of its meaning. Then use it correctly in appropriate settings.
I was accused of using a derogatory epithet once at work. I was commenting on an individual who handled his money tightly. He was, in fact, debt free, and in his own words, “lived like a monk”. Unlike many of us, he ended up being able to retire early because of his lifestyle. During the conversation with a fellow coworker, I described the individual as “niggardly”. Which created a bit of an ice storm.
niggardly
adjective
nig·gard·ly ˈni-gərd-lē
1. grudgingly mean about spending or granting : BEGRUDGING
… management was being niggardly with raises.—Dana Canedy
2. provided in meanly limited supply
… niggardly funding of planetary science.—Richard Wolkomir
Usage of Niggard and Niggardly
The words niggard and niggardly are etymologically unrelated to the highly offensive and inflammatory racial slur euphemistically referred to as the N-word, despite the words’ visual and auditory resemblance to it. Because of that resemblance, however, both niggard and niggardly are often taken to be offensive
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/niggardly
I was then taken to task by the hearer, who was a friend of mine. In this setting, even showing the actual definition of the word, he remained unconvinced. So I gave him a smile and changed my phrase to “parsimonious” and left it at that. I could not change his understanding of the label, even though both in the setting and the meaning, the term was used correctly on my part.
So when can I use labels?
There are approximately one million plus words in the English language (depending on the source of the data). But that is subject to change with the addition of slang terms and other ideations to another 300 plus or minus per year, depending on how you read the charts.
The common usage of the words among most of the populace, however, is another story… The estimated total is around only 30,000 of the over one million words available.
The common usage of the words among most of the populace, however, is another story. With the dumbing down of curriculum texts and poorly-written tombs for readership consumption, far less are actually used let alone understood. (Thus the reason why slang and epithets are used in substitution.) The estimated total is around only 30,000 of the over one million words available.
If you have ever used a word that is no longer commonly used (but still validly available), such as:
try to explain to the listener what that word means. Sometimes it is easier to use a simple label than such a word.
The same with ideologies, individuals, animals, environment, etc. The key is to not use a label to disparage a human being.
Whatever the label, does it define you?
Are you Autistic, ADHD, homosexual, logical, studious, wealthy, self-employed, an athlete, Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Atheist, etc? Are those labels?
Or are you, perhaps, stalwart, courageous, organized, disciplined, lazy, energetic, enthusiastic, tired, or suffer from physical ailments? Are these labels as well?
The answer to any label concerning you is that is does not define you. You are something far more than a word slapped on your character. It goes much deeper than this.
Take charge of getting to know yourself
If what you think about yourself came from the labels or perceptions given to you over the years, maybe it is time to take the opportunity to reshape your view of self. Put away the distractions and busyness. Sit with yourself and discover who you really are.
We are not what others think about us. They see us on the outside. We see ourselves on the inside.
One psychologist recommended using a “Victory Journal”. It actually surprised me when I began to use it. There is so much about each one of us that we ignore – the good that we do and the victory over challenges that we accomplish that so often get overshadowed by the bad images we’ve absorbed about ourselves.
We are not what others think about us. They see us on the outside. We see ourselves on the inside. Complete with all the challenges, sufferings, abuses, and victories we have endured throughout our lifetime.
What makes us strong and gives us the motivation to keep going in spite of the forces outside of ourselves is the “who” we are within.
Take the time to know who you are…again.
This isn’t a motivational journal. It’s something wildly different.
If you have lost sight of were you went, take the time to slow down. Write nightly the victories – even the smallest, seemingly most insignificant ones – in the journal. This isn’t a motivational journal. It’s something wildly different.
By the time you have filled up the book, you will rediscover your strengths – the very core of what makes you who you are.
Share your journey
Share the labels you have overcome in your lifetime. How had they shaped your thinking about who you were. And how did you reshape those thoughts into what you are today?
Let us know your experiences. Contribute to the journey in helping others find out who they are. Maybe your story will encourage someone else to join you in a mission of self-discovery.