Being quick to frustration or anger is a mortal sin. It is a sin in that it shows the pride in self that feels disgruntled at having something not go according to one’s own choice or desire.
To become frustrated, as minor as it may appear, tells of the inner desire to control one’s own world. And that very act of trying to control speaks volumes.
It says that the individual does not want anything to go against their own plans or opinions. They do not want an outside entity to tell them what to do, how to act, or what they need to fix in their own lives.
It removes God as the Author and Loving Father from their very lives.
Christians are often guilty of this..
They do not realize or recognize what is going on interiorly.
If God sees us, His little, wayward children, going along on a path that is detrimental to the salvation and perfection of their souls, He will very often put obstacles in their path to get their attention and change direction.
For example, if one of His beloved children is on a path of increased self-centeredness, He will sometimes put someone in their way who will take them down a notch or two.
The person doesn’t like it and objects. Often with frustration or outright anger. And totally rejects the lesson of humility they needed to lear to reach that next level of perfection necessary for their salvation.
Confession…
Once it is realized that perfect acceptance of such a humiliation is necessary to gain virtue, it is incumbent upon the individual to confess their lack of recognition of the gift of concerned from Father to son.
All is forgiven, and the individual can move on, remembering what they learned.
Except…
We typically do not do so.
Instead, we beat ourselves up, grieving that we could not recognize the mistake ahead of time, or committing the same sin over and over again.
In doing so, we fail to forgive ourselves.
We know that God has forgiven us, yet we do not forgive ourselves.
And in not forgiving ourselves, we, once more, rake on the role of God. We think that we should have been able to change ourselves by ourselves.
But we are only as good as our teacher. And if that teacher is us, we can never go beyond who we are. We lack the experience of going before ourselves into a greater perfection than we already have. Were we to be that perfect already, we would not have fallen into the same sin again. But we still would not be as perfect as another who has risen another level above where we are now. We must always strive to learn from those who have gone before – those who have gained that level of understanding and perfection that we have not yet reached.
And who better to know that than He who created us?
Forgiveness of self…
We need to forgive ourselves, therefore. We cannot gain peace if we think we can fix all our flaws. Again, we cannot look inside ourselves to something that is not there. Were it there and that level of perfection existed within us, we would have been able to reach it already.
But we cannot. We don’t have it. All we have is imperfection within.
If it were otherwise, then even the greatest guru that lived would be like God.
And, if they are honest with themselves, they would realize and accept that they are not.
So forgive yourself. Let the One Who loves you enough to give you lessons to perfect you also take control of your life to fix what is broken.
Being flawed, you cannot fix yourself.
Only God can.
And that can only come when your love yourself enough to realize you need to reach out and ask Him to do that for you.
And then love yourself enough to let Him do the work inside.